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Negativity can come in the form of cynicism, criticism, whining, attacking, pessimism, discontent, perfectionism, and hyperintensity. All of these behaviors can push people away, including your spouse.
"Research indicates you can get mad as hell or avoid conflict altogether. But the positivity must outweigh the negativity by five to one."Source: John Gottman, Nan Silver, "What Makes Marriage Work?", PsychologyToday.com, Mar/Apr 1994.
Do you find yourself in a bad mood on a regular basis? Do you dwell on bad things or painful memories?