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Family – The Angry Child

10 tips to empower parents.

Dear Slovie,

My 10-year-old son is getting increasingly out of hand. He yells out his demands and gets infuriated when they are not met. If I reprimand him or put him into time out, he takes out his anger on his siblings and me. He speaks very disrespectfully and tends to be quite negative. His behavior is detrimentally affecting everyone in the house. I am out of ideas. I would appreciate any advice you can give me; I am at my wits end.

Thank you,

Mom at the end of her rope

Slovie Jungreis-Wolff

Slovie's Answer 

There are times that we must deal with an angry child. The harder we try to inspire and guide, the more this child seems to pull away. As the gap between us grows, we find ourselves at a loss. We confront heavy silences, sudden outbursts, feeling estranged and a deep pain as harsh words are flung at us. Often we want to explode.

Here are 10 practical tips on how to deal with an angry child.

1. Don’t react to anger with anger.

 We accomplish nothing by losing our temper, yelling, or giving emotional ultimatums. When we are out of control, we say things we don’t mean. Often we are left with regret. We certainly don’t solve the problem and, in fact, we may cause greater damage. Parents who yell encourage children to yell back louder or retreat into a shell.

2. Don’t slap or get physical. 

Many times I receive questions from parents about hitting. Usually it goes something like this:

“My parents/in-laws/husband/wife/ More

Sweet Deception

So, the other day I wrote an article on Aspartame and I was asked to further the investigation on what side effects can be caused by it. I was going to include the paper I had written, but unfortunately, I couldn't find it. So instead I will share an article I found. There is a lot of information here but feel free to read and learn.

Aspartame is the technical name for the brand names NutraSweet, Equal, Spoonful, and Equal-Measure. It was discovered by accident in 1965 when James Schlatter, a chemist of G.D. Searle Company, was testing an anti-ulcer drug.

Aspartame was approved for dry goods in 1981 and for carbonated beverages in 1983. It was originally approved for dry goods on July 26, 1974, but objections filed by neuroscience researcher Dr John W. Olney and Consumer attorney James Turner in August 1974 as well as investigations of G.D. Searle's research practices caused the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to put approval of aspartame on hold (December 5, 1974). In 1985, Monsanto purchased G.D. Searle and made Searle Pharmaceuticals and The NutraSweet Company separate subsidiaries.

Aspartame accounts for over 75 percent of the adverse reactions to food additives reported to the FDA. Many of these reactions are very serious including seizures and death. A few of the 90 different documented symptoms listed in the report as being caused by aspartame include: Headaches/migraines, dizziness, seizures, nausea, numbness, muscle spasms, weight gain, rashes, depression, fatigue, irritability, tachycardia, insomnia, vision problems, hearing loss, heart palpitations, breathing difficulties, anxiety attacks, slurred speech, loss of taste, tinnitus, vertigo, memory loss, and joint pain.

According to researchers and physicians studying theadverse effects of aspartame, the following chronic illnesses can be triggered or worsened by ingesting of aspartame: Brain tumors, multiple sclerosis, epilepsy, chronic fatigue syndrome, parkinson's disease, alzheimer's, mental retardation, lymphoma, birth defects, fibromyalgia, and diabetes.

Aspartame is made up of three chemicals: aspartic acid, phenylalanine, and methanol. The book "Prescription for Nutritional Healing," by James and Phyllis Balch, lists aspartame under the category of "chemical poison." As you shall see, that is exactly what it is.

What Is Aspartame Made Of?

Aspartic Acid (40 percent of Aspartame)

Dr. Russell L. Blaylock, a professor of neurosurgery at the Medical University of Mississippi, recently published a book thoroughly detailing the damage that is caused by the ingestion of excessive aspartic acid from aspartame. Blaylock makes use of almost 500 scientific references to show how excess free excitatory amino acids such as aspartic acid and glutamic acid (about 99 percent of monosodium glutamate (MSG) is glutamic acid) in our food supply are causing serious chronic neurological disorders and a myriad of other acute symptoms.

How Aspartate (and Glutamate) Cause Damage

Aspartate and glutamate act as neurotransmitters in the brain by facilitating the transmission of information from neuron to neuron. Too much aspartate or glutamate in the brain kills certain neurons by allowing the influx of too much calcium into the cells. This influx triggers excessive amounts of free radicals, which kill the cells. The neural cell damage that can be caused by excessive aspartate and glutamate is why they are referred to as "excitotoxins." They "excite" or stimulate the neural cells to death.

Aspartic acid is an amino acid. Taken in its free form (unbound to proteins) it significantly raises the blood plasma level of aspartate and glutamate. The excess aspartate and glutamate in the blood plasma shortly after ingesting aspartame or products with free glutamic acid (glutamate precursor) leads to a high level of those neurotransmitters in certain areas of the brain.

The blood brain barrier (BBB), which normally protects the brain from excess glutamate and aspartate as well as toxins, 1) is not fully developed during childhood, 2) does not fully protect all areas of the brain, 3) is damaged by numerous chronic and acute conditions, and 4) allows seepage of excess glutamate and aspartate into the brain even when intact.

The excess glutamate and aspartate slowly begin to destroy neurons. The large majority (75 percent or more) of neural cells in a particular area of the brain are killed before any clinical symptoms of a chronic illness are noticed. A few of the many chronic illnesses that have been shown to be contributed to by long-term exposure to excitatory amino acid damage include:

The Impact Of Divorce Part 1

By Julienne B. Derichs LCPC

How Did This Happen to Us? 

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